Shanexit: Finding Freedom: A New Path Beyond the Church

Attending the recent apology delivered by the Archbishop was a deeply moving experience. As I sat in the pews, reflecting on the journey that led to this moment, I was filled with gratitude for those who have tirelessly worked towards healing and reconciliation within the church community.

During my conversation with the Archbishop on Saturday, I shared an idea that might have surprised him—about creating a program designed specifically for those who feel disconnected from organised religion. Many people have been hurt, marginalised, or simply no longer identify with traditional church practices. Instead of focusing on how to bring people in, I proposed a support system for those ready to step away and leave/exit the church.

I often write while listening to music, and as I was crafting this post, my playlist shifted to Alanis Morissette’s "Hands Clean." The song captures the complex and often toxic relationships that queer individuals and others can experience with church environments. While I value the Archbishop’s recognition of past wrongs, I’m ready to move forward. This program could offer a safe space for those leaving, providing the guidance and support they need as they navigate their spiritual journeys beyond the church.

Much like Captain Lone Starr in "Spaceballs," who discovers his true identity and purpose as a Prince, I believe many of us are seeking clarity and freedom from the confines of our past experiences. The notion that my cross, once a symbol of obligation, can transform into something that represents my identity and birth certificate as a Royal citizen of the Commonwealth of Heaven is both liberating and empowering.

As I reflected on this experience, I drew inspiration from my choice of outfit for the service—a white ensemble that symbolised renewal and hope. Just as Lone Starr’s journey culminated in his transformation, I envision this exit program serving as a new beginning for those who feel ready to move forward.

1. Support Circles: Create small groups for individuals to share their experiences and feelings in a safe, non-judgmental space.

2. Resource Library: Provide materials on alternative spiritual practices, self-care, and community building outside of organised religion.

3. Mentorship Opportunities: Pair individuals who are further along in their journey with those who are just beginning to explore life outside the church.

4. Workshops and Retreats: Offer events focused on personal growth, healing, and connection to foster a sense of belonging in new ways.

5. Community Engagement: Encourage participants to get involved in social justice initiatives, fostering a sense of purpose and connection to the world around them.

As we move forward, I hope this vision can spark conversations within the church community and beyond. While the apology was a necessary step towards healing, we must also create pathways for those ready to embrace new beginnings. The church can and should be a space that acknowledges all journeys, including those that lead us away from its walls, and spiritually speaking sometimes, some must leave to create space for others to enter.

If you’re interested in this initiative or have thoughts to share, let’s connect. Together, we can create a supportive environment for those ready to find their own paths.